17 Things Brides Should NOT Expect From Bridesmaids
The Huffington Post Canada
Choosing your bridesmaids and asking them to be part of your big day is an important undertaking for any bride. She's choosing the people who know her the best, the friends who can name off your food allergies and keep your embarrassing stories from university locked up in a safe.
Agreeing to be a bridesmaid is a big task as well — there can be a lot of pressure to ensure everything before the wedding and on the day of goes smoothly. OneWed.com notes open communication and being honest with the bride are the best ways to ensure the wedding is stress-free for everyone.
In the past few years, films like "Bridesmaids" and "Bachelorette" have attempted to show us the reality of being a bridesmaid: Sometimes you're broke, sometimes you hate weddings, but most of the time, you just want to see the bride truly happy.
Brides, as much as you want your wedding day to be the best day of your life, a lot it starts with your bridesmaids. Here are 17 things brides should never expect from their bridal party ... or anyone, for that matter:
Don't Ask Anyone To Lose Weight
Never. And don't try to sugarcoat things by suggesting fun "girls' nights" to fitness classes together either.
Don't Ask Bridesmaids To Alter Their Bodies At All, Actually
Don't expect any of your friends to pierce their ears or get tattoos for your wedding day. Also, don't ever ask them to go to a tanning salon or, for that matter, stay out of the sun.
Don't Expect A Huge Present
After pitching in for your bachelorette party, bridal shower(s) and anything else your bridesmaids do for you, don't expect them to add a fancy or expensive gift on top of that.
Don't Expect People To Travel For Your Bachelorette
Even if you have a travel budget, don't expect all of your friends to have one too. Las Vegas bachelorette parties are popular, but this doesn't mean you should expect your friends to take off time for your trip and pitch in for covering your costs.
Don't Expect Them To Say 'Yes' To Everything
We get it, you have this whole idea of what you want your bridesmaids to wear and do for you on your big day. But don't have the expectation that all your bridesmaids will always say 'yes' to every wedding suggestion. Also, bridesmaids, don't be afraid to say 'no'.
Don't Expect Everyone To Buy The Same Shoes
OK, getting your bridesmaids to buy the same dress is great for pictures, but expecting your bridesmaids to then also spend money on matching heels pushes it over the top. Pro tip: Not everyone likes heels.
Don't Expect People To Know What You Want
Your friends probably have a good idea of the basics: Your favourite movies, colours or foods. But don't expect them to throw you a bachelorette party and make it everything you've always wanted it to be. And don't expect it to be a surprise either.
Don't Make People Feel Bad About Being Broke
If you have a friend who isn't able to cover the cost of everything and you really want them there, offer to help them out by pitching in. And don't, we repeat don't, let the whole group know about that person's finances.
Don't Expect All Your Bridesmaids To Learn A Stupid Dance Routine
Unless of course all of them really want to.
Don't Expect The Perfect Speech
We're not all good at public speaking, and a lot of us can get shy. If you want your friends or bridesmaids to say a speech on your big day, just be grateful for the time and effort they put towards it, even if it isn't Oscar-worthy.
Don't Expect People To Be Happy About Sacrificing Their Weekends
Your friends and bridesmaids love you, but booking all of your showers, parties and shopping events on long weekends will kind of make them hate you.
Don't Expect Them To Read Your Mind
If your bridesmaids are bridesmaids for the first time, don't expect all of them to know what they're doing. Everyone will try their best to make your day perfect, but they will not know where you want your centrepieces to be or what kind of food you prefer during your shower unless you tell them.
Don't Expect Them To Always Have Fun
Being a bridesmaid can be tiring, stressful and a lot of work. At the end of the day, the last thing any tired person wants to do is continue dancing on the dance floor.
Don't Expect Them To Stay Sober
On your wedding night, it's kind of their celebration too after all the work they did. Don't expect your bridesmaids to not have fun.
Don't Expect All Your Friends To Get Your Customs
If your wedding itself consists of a lot of cultural customs or traditions, don't expect all of your bridesmaids to pick them up right away. For example, at a lot of Hindu weddings, bridesmaids are expected to steal the groom's shoes.
Don't Expect Them To Be As Excited As You Are
This will probably be one of the most exciting and happiest days of your life — but this doesn't mean everyone will feel the same way. As happy as your bridesmaids will be for you, not everyone (especially people who are recently single or going through a divorce) will be peachy that day.
This article exists as part of the online archive for HuffPost Canada.
Certain site features have been disabled. If you have questions or concerns,
please check our FAQ or