If you have an Instant Pot collecting dust in your shame closet, this one's for you.
The versatile electronic instant-cooker might have a cult following, but not everyone is drinking the Kool-Aid. The promise of creating nutritious meals for your family — in an instant! — has likely lured many a curious parent to purchase an IP (yes, there's a lingo now. People obsessed with their IPs are also called "Potheads," by the way).
But, as a Montreal mom points out in a hilarious viral Facebook post, buying an Instant Pot is only half the battle. Actually using that bad boy can be intimidating AF. Why are there so many buttons? Is it going to explode? It sounds like it's going to explode. WHY WOULD ANYONE EVEN WANT TO MAKE YOGURT?
"Update on the Instant Pot ... so as you can see, it's still in the box and has made its way from the kitchen to a corner of the living room. I remain intimidated by the size and many buttons," Bunmi Laditan, the author of Confessions of a Domestic Failure and former "Honest Toddler" blogger, wrote on Facebook Monday.
"Question for the manufacturers: Why should a kitchen appliance resemble a time machine? I am not an engineer nor did I go to any kind of technical school. I'm a regular person with regular dreams."
Three weeks earlier, Laditan — who's known for her dry wit and honest take on motherhood — posted that she'd purchased the aforementioned Instant Pot, but then bought McDonald's instead of using it.
"It's the thought that counts, guys. And I thought about making dinner," she wrote, alongside a photo of the IP and a happy meal.
Fans heard nothing more about her Instant Pot until Monday, when Laditan posted two photos: one of the IP still in its box, and the other of the crock pot she bought to replace it.
"At this point I feel like the Instant Pot is not only judging me but bullying me by existing. I don't deserve this. Do I want to make nutritious meals for my family? Yes. Am I willing to get NASA certification to do so? No. At the end of the day, I don't need this kind of negativity in my life," Laditan wrote, inadvertently preaching to everyone who's felt overwhelming guilt cooking beef stew in a normal amount of time knowing they could have done it in 20 mins in the damn IP.
"If you have a kitchen appliance that is lowering your self-esteem, return it or sell it online because frankly, life is hard enough without being told you're not good enough by inanimate objects."
People can relate to the IP being a bully
Thousands of people commented on Laditan's post, many of them sharing their own similar IP experiences (or non-experiences).
"The learning curve on the Instant Pot, in my experience, involves several months of just letting it sit on the counter so you can get used to each other, followed by a six-week rice internship before graduating to shredded chicken and pulled pork using only the manual settings. After about a year of that you're ready for some heavier lifting, aided by Pinterest and Xanax," one person wrote on Facebook.
WATCH: How to make things in your IP if you ever take it out of the box. Story continues below video.
"I got my Instant Pot 2+ years ago. Thought it was going to revolutionize my life. Yet here it still sits, completely unopened, on the fridge. I mean I DID take it out of its shipping box maybe mid-2017 so there was some progress. It mocks me, I think," another person wrote.
"It took me nine months to get up the nerve to cook some plain chicken in my instant pot. That went well, so I bought a bigger one with visions of colorful, flavorful and photo worthy four course meals lifted right from the chamber. Now both instant pots live on top of my refrigerator, protecting it from dust," another person commented on the post.
"I don't even *own* an Instant Pot and I still feel taunted and bullied by it," another commenter added.
Lots of people are afraid of their IPs
The internet is brimming with IP recipes for everything from French toast to applesauce, to mac and cheese. The appliance broke sales records on Amazon Prime day, the New York Times has called it "The Kitchen Gadget That Spawned a Religion," and it was one of the top-searched items in Canada the morning of Black Friday, according to Google Trends.
"This compact, multifunctional appliance steams, warms, sautés, and saves counter space — but it just might lead you to order takeout in a fit of annoyance," The Boston Globe wrote last year.
So what we're saying is: it's not just you.
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