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What's the Difference Between Power and Empowerment?

What's the Difference Between Power and Empowerment?
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What does empowerment really mean? Where does empowerment begin? Discussions around women's empowerment are very topical now and I have been pondering what empowerment means and observed that there are several different types or concepts of empowerment for women. Two conversations I had recently made me think again about empowerment, two with brilliant women I know, and one with a brilliant woman who can no longer speak to me (although I still speak to her). My father's passing away also caused me to consider whether he empowered me or put an almost impossible burden on me.

My friend in the wheelchair with the broken foot continues to provide fodder for thought and entertainment as daily she assumes more of the personality of Blanche in "Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?" As I take on the role of Jane and continue to torment her, we have provided each other with many laughs and since she is confined, she has spent much more time communicating via email.

My friend, is one of the most successful businesswomen and entrepreneurs I have ever met. She is recognized internationally and is the recipient of many awards for outstanding achievements. She could be a stand-up comedian, if she could in fact stand up! So, I was surprised that she wrote that she always felt that she was not quite good enough because she did not have a university degree. She did not go to college and went to work straight out of school and because she did not have a degree she limited herself in jobs she applied for because she assumed she would not be considered, even though she had and still has an outstanding success record. Of course, maybe that lack of degree is what gave her the drive to be a successful entrepreneur and make opportunities for herself, but sad that she had this feeling of not being good enough.

So, I was again intrigued when a few days later I had a similar conversation with another gorgeous, highly successful woman who owned and ran a top tourist resort for many years and now runs a successful art college to hear her say, she always felt she was not good enough because she did not have a degree. Again, maybe she worked harder to become a success but still interesting that the feeling of not being 'as good as' because she does not have a degree is in her head, not in the 'heads' of others. Anyone would look at her and think, 'wow', she has it all!

The third conversation and perhaps the saddest of all, is my own daughter-in-law. My daughter-in-law was totally driven and motivated and a brilliant business woman. She created a business against huge odds and in a hostile business environment in a macho country. She had a beautiful daughter and a husband who adored her. She broke the mould and was fearless, she stood up to everyone including the mafia. She was loved by thousands. And yet, she too, had her demons. As a result of her hard work and not allowing enough time for herself, she put on weight and never felt 'good enough' because she was no longer slim, although still gorgeous. In desperation she underwent liposuction, hoping for a quick fix and a boost to her self confidence, esteem, self worth. Sadly, just hours after the procedure, she died of complications.

My conversations with this brilliant woman are now one-sided. I remain committed to fulfilling her vision. So, in considering these conversations with three brilliant women, I think again about power vs. empowerment. All three are indeed powerful women. All three highly successful. The personality of my daughter-in-law and her vision still drives her company today. And, when asked, these women also do not understand the concept of empowerment. As powerful as they were and still are, they never fully psychologically empowered themselves because of outside pressures or images of what society requires in order to be successful or other internal demons. In other words, in order for women to be truly empowered we first need to empower ourselves.

And, my father, he always told me I could do and be whatever I wanted to be, to be proud of who I am and where I come from and the sky is the limit. He did not have a sense of failure. He did give me the confidence to go for what I wanted, he empowered me to break out of the mould, but he also put the burden on me that if I achieved anything less in life, then I only had myself to blame -- an interesting dilemma and a tough burden to live up to. But he did teach me to empower myself psychologically.

So, maybe women do have to think more like men and take a page out of Richard Branson's book: "If someone offers you an amazing opportunity and you're not sure you can do it, say yes -- then learn how to do it later." No issue of power vs. empowerment there!

Make sense? It does to me.

This blog is dedicated to my father who passed away this week. He taught me to believe in myself and that anything is achievable.

Andrina Lever is a featured speaker at the APEC Women Leadership Forum 2014, 20-22 August 2014 in Beijing. For more information, please visit here.

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