My definition is a very simple one: "codependency" occurs when we put other people's needs ahead of our own on a fairly consistent basis. In truth, when we are codependent, we are also people-pleasers who will go to virtually any lengths to avoid unpleasant conflict with others.
Registered Clinical Counsellor
Candace Plattor, M.A., R.C.C., is a therapist in private practice, specializing in addictive behaviours such as alcohol and drug abuse, eating disorders, gambling, internet addiction, compulsive overspending and codependency in relationships. <br> <br> Having graduated from the Adler School of Professional Psychology with a Masters degree in counseling psychology in 2001, Candace helps clients and their loved ones understand their addictive behaviors and make healthier life choices for themselves. <br> <br> Candace gives many popular and well-attended talks based on her award-winning books: <em>Loving an Addict, Loving Yourself: The Top 10 Survival Tips for Loving Someone with an Addiction</em>, and <em>Loving an Addict, Loving Yourself: The Workbook</em>. She has been featured on TV and radio programs throughout North America and has become a favorite go-to expert for news related interviews in the Vancouver area. Visit her <a href="https://www.facebook.com/LovingAnAddictLovingYourself" rel="nofollow">Facebook page</a> and her <a href="http://www.candaceplattor.com" rel="nofollow">website</a> for more information.
I'm so happy that the stigma associated with addiction is being lifted in this way and we're finally talking about it! But what about the loved ones of those who are addicted? These people suffer and struggle right alongside the addicts in their lives.
09/09/2014 05:32 EDT
Why is mental illness such a stigmatized condition? As an addictions therapist, I have never understood that. The way I see it, mental illness is exactly the same as physical illness -- it is, in fact, physical illness just like any affliction having to do with the body.
08/12/2014 02:49 EDT
After working for nearly 25 years with the loved ones of people struggling with addiction, I'm still amazed by how many come to their first session with me and say "I know I'm enabling, but..." Do you have an addicted loved one in your life? Are you already aware that you're doing things you probably shouldn't be doing, in the guise of helping them?
07/16/2014 12:30 EDT
Two 12-year-old girls who -- with deliberate premeditation -- decided to repeatedly stab another 12-year-old girl they knew, with the intention of killing her. And truly, I don't know what to think -- or even how to express my feelings about it. Are we no longer shocked by this?
06/05/2014 08:33 EDT
We are all shocked and outraged by Elliot Rodger's shooting spree in Isla Vista, California -- with three legally purchased handguns and over 400 rounds of ammunition. I can understand us being outraged -- but shocked? Really?
05/26/2014 05:22 EDT
This horrible violence is bound to happen again, somewhere else, today or tomorrow, maybe in my neighborhood or yours -- how can any of us think it won't?
04/22/2014 05:34 EDT
Has all this violence gotten our attention yet? Has anyone you know been murdered yet, or murdered someone else? Do we have to know the people involved personally before we decide to rise up as a society and say NO! to the violence that's all around us?
04/16/2014 05:34 EDT
Deep in our heart of hearts, as a collective society, how can we be surprised by this kind of over-the-top violent behaviour from our kids when we allow them -- our leaders of tomorrow -- to be fed on this these "killing sprees" in the various forms of media day in and day out?
04/12/2014 01:13 EDT
I'm hoping that whoever takes over for the executive director -- and for his other cronies who believe in their own sense of righteous importance and entitlement -- will look again at these programs with clearer eyes and sharper minds. I truly hope we will soon see some positive changes in this long-running DTES agency that has served a lot of needy people.
03/22/2014 12:27 EDT
When Kimmel invited Ford to appear as a guest on his talk show, sharing the bill with Gonzo from <em>Sesame Street</em>, most of us knew that nothing good was going to come of this. But what actually transpired was, in my view, unbelievably awful -- more so than I could have imagined. By now, we all understand that Rob Ford is a sick man, in any number of ways. His various addictive behaviours, from food, to alcohol, to lying and yes, perhaps to crack, appear to not even begin to crumble the façade of a man who desperately needs help with some pretty clear physical and mental health issues. And Jimmy Kimmel should be ashamed of himself.
03/05/2014 05:15 EST
I am simply appalled that a 15-year-old boy who was starved, abused, and deprived of medical attention -- all at the hands of his parents -- was allowed to live with them in the first place. What if we raised our societal bar and actually trained people to become better parents?
02/25/2014 05:21 EST
In my lengthy experience with addiction, both as a practicing addict and as a professional therapist, I've seen that controlled drinking and/or using just doesn't work because, as we who work in this field well know, addiction is a progressive condition that becomes worse over time.
02/20/2014 05:27 EST
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