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David Martin

Full-time writer of short humour and political satire

David Martin is a lawyer by training and a retired federal public servant. He is now a full-time writer of short humour and political satire whose work can be found at Dave has been writing op-ed pieces and humorous essays for more than 25 years and his work has appeared on the op-ed pages of most major North American daily newspapers. He is also the author of My Friend W, a collection of his political satire published in 2005 by Arriviste Press; Dare to be Average, a collection of his humour pieces published in 2010 by; Screams & Whispers, a collection of his humour pieces published in 2013 by CreateSpace and King Donald I, a collection of his political satire published in 2016 by CreateSpace. His most recent collection of political satire is entitled Donnie’s First Year and is available on and

A Generic Stump Speech For Today's Candidates

There's no doubt about it; it's a long presidential campaign. With months still to go until the election, Republican and Democratic candidates have their work cut out for them. The constant demands of...
06/10/2016 11:45 EDT
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6 Reasons Not To Elect Donald Trump

As the primary season comes to an end, it's time to get serious about this presidential nominating thing. Sure, it's been a real laugh pretending that Donald Trump will be the next president, but there are plenty of reasons you shouldn't allow that to happen.
04/26/2016 04:16 EDT
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America Is A Cult

America is a cult. Think about it: a cult is a system of veneration and devotion to a particular figure, object or idea. In this case, the object of veneration is America itself. One of the characteristics of a cult is control of the membership as, for example, by taxing them even if they live outside the country. Another characteristic is shunning as in making it difficult and expensive for members to leave.
04/19/2016 12:30 EDT
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Let's Give Losing Hockey Teams Something To Play For

Canadian-based teams aren't very good. Despite league-leading attendance and legions of diehard fans, our teams seldom compare favourably with U.S.-based teams. What can we do in the meantime to maintain fan interest in our national game? The answer to our current dilemma: a playoff battle of the also-rans.
04/04/2016 04:23 EDT
Wilfredo Lee/AP

Good Luck Making America Great Again

A U.S. presidential election comes a wealth of patriotic platitudes. Chief among these bromides is the oft-repeated assertion that America is the greatest nation on Earth. Until now, I've accepted that statement as gospel. But rather than simply take it on faith, I figured it was an appropriate time to assess and confirm its factual underpinnings.
03/23/2016 04:49 EDT
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Will Canada Become The Austria Of The 1930s?

When it comes to understanding the seemingly unprecedented Donald trump phenomenon, sometimes history provides some interesting parallels that can serve as a modern warning sign. In this case, I'm thinking of Austria in the 1930s, a nation that shared much culturally, politically and linguistically with its neighbor Germany but had only one-tenth its population. Sound familiar?
03/17/2016 05:14 EDT
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God Sends Memo To U. S. Presidential Candidates

Please stop insulting, trashing and schlonging your fellow candidates. That's not the Christian, Islamic, Jewish, Hindu or Buddhist thing to do. And please, please, please don't use my name to promote a pro-gun agenda. I've worked for millennia to build a peace-loving reputation and I don't need you undermining it.
03/07/2016 11:17 EST
Andrew Harnik/AP

The 5 Stages Of Grief Explain The Rise Of Trump

Accepting your own death or the death of a loved one is a healthy and liberating step. In the case of Mr. Trump, however, it's not entirely clear whose death is being accepted. If it's the demise of the Republican Party, that may be a good thing. If it's the end of America, then it's probably not.
03/02/2016 11:45 EST
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Why I Would Make A Great Senator

Dear Independent Advisory Board for Senate Appointments: I hear that you're looking for a few good men (and women, too, of course) to quickly fill five Senate seats from the provinces with the most vacancies, namely Manitoba, Ontario and Quebec. Luckily for you folks, I'm available right now.
02/25/2016 11:38 EST
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America's Fear Of Foreign Political Donations Is Seriously Misguided

Not since I was 18 and U. S. Senator Eugene McCarthy was running for president in 1968 at the height of the Vietnam War have I felt such an urge to get involved. Today in 2016 I look towards America from my chilly Canadian perch and I again fear for my American friends, although this time the enemy is a heartless, right-wing plutocracy threatening to destroy the middle class.
02/23/2016 02:11 EST