My parents have been a huge inspiration to me. They have been amazing examples of how to keep a marriage happy and more importantly how to keep each other happy. When I think about what I want from my marriage, or how I should treat my husband and my family, I look no further than one of the happiest marriages I know, the one of my parents.
To celebrate my parents 50th wedding anniversary this year, I came up with 10 things I learned about relationships from my Mom and Dad!
No matter how old you are, or how long you have been married sex is very important! My parents were not shy about their bodies (though I wish they had been sometimes lol) or the fact that they loved a good roll in the hay. In our house growing up we knew if the headboard was a-rockin, don't come a-knocking! When our friends parents were getting divorced, I was always happy to see their door locked!
Be romantic! In our house we learned that flowers and cards are not just for Valentine's Days and birthdays - they are for whenever. I loved how both my parents hid cards for each other when they went away without each other. It was so nice to watch two people who genuinely loved each other and to see the smile on their faces as you found a card the other had hid in their suitcase or under the pillow was priceless.
Do stuff with your family! Whether it was the cottage, Ontario Place, the Sonny and Cher concert, going to Disney, Mexico or Florida, my favourite memories were of us spending quality time together. This hasn't changed now with the grandkids either. My parents both seem to have boundless amounts of energy and never want to disappoint.
If you took money out of the equation, there would be a lot less fighting. I did learn from a young age that money can cause a lot of fights. I do remember each month when the Visa bill would come in, there was usually a fight in the house. What matters is what my parents did after the fight and how they get over it. My parents didn't let fights go on for days or weeks, they got over them quickly and taught me that it is more important to be happy than being right....even though I do love being right!
Appreciate what each other contributes to the relationship. Treat each other like equals and with respect. Whether you are the breadwinner or the stay at home parent, you both have an equal say in how to raise your family.
Have each other's backs! Whether they thought the other was right or wrong, they always supported one another. I always really respected this in both of them. If someone hurt one of them, if was like they hurt both of them. They were always a team and stuck by each other, which is something I always admired.
What really matters in life is that you are happy! My parents told us this over and over as kids. They never tried to push us into hobbies, career paths or relationships that were not right for us. They always told us it was our life and the thing they wanted most for us was happiness.
Have your own life! They showed us that it is just as important to spend time together as it is to spend time apart from the marriage. It is important to have your own friends and hobbies and to create a life for yourself outside the marriage. The key to happiness in a relationship is to also feel fulfilled as a person, and not just as a parent.
Money is meant for sharing! My parents have always been so generous with us and our families. They have always made sure we had everything we could ever need. I can see the pure joy they get from helping us achieve our goals and dreams in life., and I can't wait to help our son Milo, achieve his dreams.
And lastly, the most important thing I have learned from their marriage is....if you really screw up, just buy a diamonds! It always seemed to work for my dad!