Couples therapy is a very helpful tool for partners facing all sorts of challenges. It can help you learn how to communicate better, resolve conflict more efficiently, maintain a healthy sex life and more. Honestly, what’s not to love?
And, like many good things in life, it also provides fodder for humor. Many folks on Twitter have shared their takes on the couples counseling experience ― from imagined scenarios to relatable anecdotes to one-liners.
Below, we’ve rounded up some funny and relatable tweets about couples therapy:
Me: What's the score, who's winning?
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) October 31, 2017
Therapist: Ok so that's really not how couples counseling works.
Wears an "I'm with stupid" shirt to marriage counseling.
— Marl (@Marlebean) June 9, 2016
Me: I just don’t see how Luigi could afford a mansion like that on a plumber’s salary, especially since he worked for his brother
— The Dad (@thedad) March 2, 2019
Wife: see what I mean?
Therapist: shut up for a second he has a point
[couples therapy]
— Floyd is dead (@dafloydsta) November 24, 2015
HER: He's always talking down to me
ME: *heavy sigh* It's called being condescending but I doubt you knew that, Karen
Therapist: So why...why are you...here?
— The Personification of nEvil (@TheAlexNevil) February 21, 2018
Me: My wife thinks I’m immature
T: And has she...has she actually CAN YOU STOP DOING THAT??!!
M: (I put the bubble wrap down)
[couples therapy]
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) May 11, 2015
therapist: what do you each think makes a relationship work?
Him: Trust
Me: a fully stocked pantr --trust.
*Bob the Builder takes Wendy's hand at couples therapy*
— Ken Jennings (@KenJennings) July 16, 2016
...Can we fix it?
Couples therapy 1999: he doesn't tell me I'm pretty anymore
— kim monte 🏳️🌈 (@KimmyMonte) May 7, 2017
Couples therapy 2017: he hasn't liked one of my tweets in like 8 months
[Couples Therapy]
— Saucy Kensington (@Book_Krazy) July 31, 2015
HER: He keeps pretending he's a doctor. This relationship is dead
HIM: I'm calling it. Time of death, 9:26
ME: OMG SEE!
[marriage counseling]
— Floyd is dead (@dafloydsta) August 28, 2017
She doesn't think I'm very romantic
"He wears a fanny pack to bed"
IT'S FOR HOLDING SNACKS, KAREN
THERAPIST: why do you want to end your marriage?
— Andy H. (@AndyAsAdjective) May 20, 2018
ME: she uses the flesh colored emojis instead of the default yellow ones
THERAPIST: [nodding]
When you say something like that, I feel like YOU'RE A DAMN MORON.
— 〰 Just Linda 〰 (@LindaInDisguise) October 13, 2013
(This marriage counseling is really helping me express myself better.)
You think you have a good marriage? Well, at couples therapy my wife and I threw our shoulders out from high-fiving each other so much!
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) August 25, 2012
[at couples therapy]
— Kalvin (@KalvinMacleod) January 3, 2015
"He’s always so suspicious."
I am not.
"You patted my father down for a wire at Christmas."
He has a moustache.
My wife just made me put the fitted sheet on the bed by myself so I guess we are going back to couples counseling.
— Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) February 23, 2013
{marriage counseling}
— Marl (@Marlebean) July 28, 2015
I guess it all started when I saw him put the toothpaste on before the water...
*therapist scribbles furiously*
[couples therapy]
— Saucy Kensington (@Book_Krazy) April 12, 2016
Her: HE'S CHEATING!
Therapist: Let's hear his side
Him: EVERYONE KNOWS YOU SAY "SHOOT" AFTER ROCK-PAPER-SCISSORS KAREN!
(at marriage counseling)
— MyMomologue (@MyMomologue) December 19, 2016
Him: YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!
Me: Why are you afraid? What do you think will happen if you refill the soap dispenser?
It was close, then a tie, then we went into overtime, but I emerged victorious. I did it - I won couples therapy!
— Sarah Thyre (@SarahThyre) February 25, 2012
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