When I was going through the absolute hell of divorce and infidelity, I remember people offered supportive words like, "Hang in there, things will get better" and, "You never know what great things might lay around the corner."
But my God, my God, my God (shaking head)... I never imagined my road would eventually lead to this.
I just got back from Ottawa where I was on the set of a movie being made about the first year of my life post-divorce. That's right -- a movie. About me. Little' ol me -- just a former stay-at-home mom of three kids, whose entire world, six years ago, was so pulverized, she didn't even want to get out of bed, let alone forge a new career or identity for herself.
The movie is based on my memoir, The Secret Sex Life of a Single Mom, which, I must add, was an ordeal unto itself to write: I didn't even know if I was capable of writing a book, let alone write one that merited publishing. I also had major fears and reservations around exposing my dating/ sex life to the world, especially since I'm a mom.
But when American publisher Seal Press, said they wanted it, I chose to leap instead of hide. I also chose to celebrate: I'd dared to go after what, in many ways, seemed an impossible dream. And after the book came out last year, I thought that was the end of my journey; I was prepared to move on.
But a few months ago, Lifetime exercised a movie option on it. And right now, at this very moment, it continues to be filmed in Ottawa, with Ashley Jones, starring in it as me. ME. Little ol me. And I'm dumbfounded as to where I'm to "put" this experience:
For as I stood on set this past week and saw, with my own two eyes, the money, the crew, the actors, the equipment, the BIGNESS of my personal history come to life, I was overwhelmed. It's like I'd entered The Twilight Zone. Everyone was so respectful, inundated with me questions, wanted photos taken with me, hell, there was even a trailer outside with my name on it. What the...? What does one even do with such an experience? It all just seemed surreal.
And so I'm writing this today with a sweeping sense of surrender -- to the highs, lows and unexpectedness of life. My humility is vast, as are my feelings of gratitude and awe. To have gone from a place of complete despair, fear, even hopelessness; to be tested and hammered around one hard issue after another for years , only to arrive here, to this gigantic production, is well... beyond my comprehension. And I hope in some small way that my journey helps give you faith in a bigger picture for your divorce journey; cause you just don't know what great things lie around corners up ahead on your path.
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