Each year of a child’s life brings new challenges and moments of humor for parents.
The age of 7 is no exception. Amid the chaos and hilarity, many moms and dads raising 7-year-olds turn to Twitter to lament their frustrations and share LOL-worthy anecdotes.
We’ve rounded up 35 such tweets. Scroll down for some funny and all-too-real musings from the front lines of parenting 7-year-olds.
I’m in season 14 episode 6 of my 7-year-old’s story.— Jessie (@mommajessiec) December 11, 2019
My 7yo sure says “I’m not lying!” a lot for someone who is usually lying.— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) August 13, 2018
Somewhere between asking me to make mac n cheese and me serving it, 7yo decided he didn’t like cheese anymore— MumInBits (@MumInBits) April 15, 2019
My favorite part of going to the bathroom are the little notes my 7yo slides under the door saying "we are hungry"— Marcy G 🍕 (@BunAndLeggings) June 23, 2019
Me: Ready for school?— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) January 10, 2017
7yo: [in only underwear with pants tied around his neck like a scarf & a sock on each hand] Almost
7-year-old: What can I have for a snack?— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 7, 2020
Me: Any fruit.
7: Strawberry ice cream.
Me: Try again.
7: A banana split.
“I. AM. NOT. BEING. DRAMATIC!”— Ramblin Mama (@ramblinma) December 10, 2019
- my super zen 7-year-old slamming her door
My 7-year-old told me she wants a pet chinchilada. Do I find this at the pet store or a Mexican restaurant?— Jessie (@mommajessiec) November 26, 2019
7yo just discovered Beyonce's album on her iPod also includes the movie.— kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) June 28, 2016
"I can watch this when I poop!"
My 7yo's toothbrush has a suction cup on the bottom, so she stuck it on the tile wall and tried brushing hands-free. *Wipes tear of pride*— SpacedMom (@copymama) September 10, 2017
7yo: *visiting me in the hospital* Do you have any snacks?— Heather 🦈 doo do doo do doo do doo do (@dishs_up) April 20, 2019
7yo made a weird oregami dinosaur and I told him I loved it and now my bedroom is filled with 18,000 weird oregami dinosaurs— MumInBits (@MumInBits) May 23, 2019
My son asked my 7yo how she would survive a bear attack and she replied she would try to be his friend, thus making her the most adorable of my children but also the least likely to survive an encounter with an actual bear.— Jessie (@mommajessiec) September 24, 2019
[laser sounds]— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 4, 2020
[enraged death screech]
Me: What were you doing?
7-year-old: Taking a bath.
Being a parent teaches you a lot about yourself. For instance, this morning my 7yo told me that I’m not as funny as I think I am.— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) May 7, 2018
Me: u won’t know how to ride a bike right away. Takes practice— Sabaa Tahir (@sabaatahir) March 18, 2019
Me: took me many tries.
7yo: can I try now?
Me: be patient
7yo: Mama, can I try PLEASE
Me: be prepared to eat it
7yo: 🙄🙄 *gets on bike* *rides away*
7yo: *yells* u were not as smart as me maybe
7yo: Daddy, I can't find my stuffed animal— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) August 16, 2017
Me: Here it is
7yo: How did you find it?
Me: I looked
7yo: Is “tickling your fancy” like when you tickle a rich person?— SpacedMom (@copymama) August 22, 2017
I don’t know about you, but this is why I had kids.
I just groaned in frustration and my 7yo said “Yeah, I feel ya” without looking up from Minecraft— AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) January 6, 2019
Me: “Guys, we are leaving in 5 minutes.”— Jessie (@mommajessiec) April 6, 2018
7yo: “Do I need to wear shoes?”
[4 minutes later]
7yo: “What about pants?”
7yo: I'm writing a poem. What rhymes with 'love' and has to do with Thanksgiving?— Nicole Chung (@nicolesjchung) November 3, 2015
Me: You know what's awesome? STEM careers.
7yo: I am so excited about sleeping in tomorrow.— Sarah del Rio (@sarahdelri0) September 4, 2015
Me: Me too!
7yo: I think I'll probably sleep until SEVEN!
Me: *sobs quietly
7yo was doing parkour over the furniture when he slammed into a door, got his jeans caught on the handle and was kind of dangling upside down and I don’t know if that’s all part of parkour but I clapped anyway— MumInBits (@MumInBits) May 6, 2019
My 7yo threw a Mother's Day card in my face while I was sleeping, and yelled "happy Mother's Day!" If that doesn't say motherhood I don't know what does. It was a shitty card too, but I loved it.— Marcy G 🍕 (@BunAndLeggings) May 12, 2019
Wife: “Do NOT lick the dog!”— ReasonsMySonIsCrying (@ReasonsMySonCry) April 21, 2019
7yo: “But he licked ME!”
Does laying in bed with my eyes shut make me look like I want to search my house for a 1/4" Pokemon figurine bc apparently my 7yo thinks so— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) August 18, 2017
My 7yo just asked me if people are “made out of meat.” Like, can we just have an uncomfortable sex talk like everyone else?— Emily McCombs (@msemilymccombs) April 14, 2019
My new favorite thing is to say pokemon names wrong and annoy my 7yo.— Marcy G 🍕 (@BunAndLeggings) February 11, 2019
7yo: PIKACHU! Geez mom!!
7-year-old: I'm too tired for this.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 6, 2019
Me: For what?
7: *motions vaguely at the world*
7yo: Mom, can you pick out my outfit?— Jessie (@mommajessiec) March 30, 2019
7: It has to be purple.
7: And a dress.
7: And have cats riding shooting stars with blue sequins and say sparkle.
Me: *brings her dress*
7: No, not that one.
My 7yo said if she ever gets married she wants to have a pajama-themed wedding, and I feel like my parenting has come to fruition.— SpacedMom (@copymama) June 11, 2017
7yo and his friends have formed a band and as I watch those kids trying to create music together I search for words of encouragement but honestly they’re shit and I just want the noise to stop— MumInBits (@MumInBits) April 26, 2019
Just discovered my 7yo wearing his underwear backwards again. Playing classical music while pregnant is bullshit.— Minivan (@my_minivan_life) January 20, 2013
If you have any problems falling asleep, just have a 7yo explain to you what happened in a movie they saw.— Ann (@writerPT) August 11, 2013
7-year-old: I'm tired.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 10, 2020
Me: Maybe you should go to bed earlier.
7: Maybe today should be canceled.