04/14/2014 05:18 EDT | Updated 06/14/2014 05:59 EDT

Please Don't Associate Me With 'Bud Light Living'

Tanya Constantine via Getty Images

I realize that there are a lot of things to be concerned about in regard to my generation. We're lazy, we're entitled, we have no attention span, we're the first generation to never exceed our parents, we communicate in 140 characters, we're fucked up about sex because of the internet, we let acid wash come back, the list goes on. We're cut from the same cloth as Miley Cyrus! Times are dark my Millennial soldiers! That being said, as a millennial, the thing that terrifies me the most about my generation is a little thing called 'Bud Light Living'.

You've seen the commercial, (or if you haven't here it is: ) a group of sorta fat boring dudes go out and have "the best night of their lives", seemingly thanks to not giving a shit, cliches, and Bud Light. That's fine. I guess. What scares me about Bud Light Living is that it perpetuates a culture of lowest common denominators. Don't get me wrong, that's genius for an ad campaign! The broadest possible spectrum of people will connect to it, they'll all go out, they'll all buy beer, they'll all have the best night of their lives. I get how advertising works. The scary part is how accurate a depiction of our generation it really is.

I might not use their douchey formula, but I've had several nights that looked eerily similar to a commercial narrative that makes me gag whenever I see it. Are we all that boring? Is Bud Light Living really what it looks like to be living it up in our 20's? Do I have to marry a dude who wears a backwards baseball cap and a light blue button up shirt to the bar and have 2.5 kids that we raise in the suburbs?

You know when you look at old footage from the late 60's early 70's Woodstocky times and everyone is passionate and fucking The Man and growing their hair long. twenty-somethings had some legitimate things to fight for, they were making huge sociological changes in their culture, they were breaking away from the complacency of their parents and starting something new. Guess what? As it stands when our kids look at old footage of our "wild times" as new adults they are watching this commercial. That's so embarrassing!

And what I think is important to remember is that the twenty-somethings of the 60's weren't any different than us. They had the same advantages and disadvantages that we have -- I mean, minus iStuff. But they felt comfortable enough to get weird and be anti-establishment and fight for what they believed in. Why don't we? When our mayor was caught literally smoking crack (along with a pot-pourri of other illicit activities) we didn't take to the streets, we didn't protest, we didn't fight, we didn't demand justice, we took selfies with him at the bar. Dudes, that doesn't look great on us.

I don't want to be lumped in with a complacent, over-educated crowd of under-achievers who trick themselves into thinking beer, take-out and random hook-ups is how they're gonna coast through their twenties and pretend to be happy. I'm not okay with 'Bud Light Living' being an acceptable depiction of modern happiness. So team, what are we going to do?

We can't all go to under-developed countries and dig wells, it's too late for that. (Not saying that isn't super valuable and very cool, if you're out there digging wells) We've already missed our opportunity to cover-up how lame we are by backpacking through Thailand or taking surfing lessons in Australia. In fact, in my opinion, it's that kind of one off, "Do-Goodery" that helps us delude ourselves into thinking we're good or interesting people. It takes more than just a couple wells and a few nights in a hostel to change the conversation about our generation. We need a total upgrade. We need to throw out this Pinterest complacency and change our attitude.

Stop wasting time waiting for our real lives to begin when we're older and actually make some kind of difference right now. How do we do that? I have no goddamn idea. But I'm sure I'll come up with a great answer while discussing it with my fellow out-of -work, liberal arts degree friends over a couple of Bud Lights. Scratch that. I'm gonna start on my road to Bud Light recovery by drinking a more interesting beer.


Super Bowl Commercials 2014