Unfortunately, perceived favouritism can create a divide between siblings
This Christmas, their laser-beam eyes are focused on you. You're the dish of the day. You're gonna be stuffed with advice and ladled with criticism. Because they can't stand themselves. Deep in their souls, they feel like failures. What better antidote than subtly belittling you via the mechanism of meddling.
Instead of trying to get your parents to love and validate you today, you'd be better off facing the truth about them, giving up your futile attempts at winning their love, and focusing your attention instead on developing the self-love and self-confidence that your childhood deprived you of.
The truth is, I've never watched the Duggar family on TV. Still, with all the current media coverage, it's impossible not to be aware of the fact that the eldest son Josh has confessed to inappropriate sexual behaviour, as a teenager, toward four of his sisters and a babysitter. I work with victims of sexual abuse every day in my psychotherapy practice, so I feel I have some insight into the subject at hand. Instead of adding to the judgements in favour of or against the family, I thought that it would be a good idea to look for the learning opportunities here.
Why is there a tendency for daughter-in-laws to have bumpy relationships with mother-in-laws? It's understandable that conflict can arise when two different ideologies collide. Ideologies about child-rearing, domestic chores, finances, "wifely" duties, working outside the home, personal appearance, "husband care" and so on.
As much as they may have annoyed you when you were younger, there are so many benefits to having a sibling. Whether you're
All too often I hear unnecessary stories of families fighting for control, trying to make decisions they have no authority to make and almost coming to blows because a loved one is ill and there are no directives in place granting permission for care. In some cases, plans had been made but had not been reviewed for years and were outdated.
Having worked for seven years with my daughter, I know first-hand that the working relationship can be fraught with difficulties. It is all too easy to slip into the usual pecking order, with mother, of course, always knowing best.