I love being a fan. There are a lot of reasons why and it all boils down to this: it simply makes me happy. I have no agenda. I'm not a badass superstar fan for any reason other than that it fills my world with joy. I'm not a groupie (i.e., my fandom isn't sexually driven). I have no illusions. Jim Cuddy may have joked about going for coffee with me and Corey Hart may have written me into a song, but I know those two -- and all the other artists I've met -- are not my buddies (of any kind). I'm just a fan revelling in the moment, the music, and the rockstar glow
Ooh, couples, what is it that really breaks our heart? A lack of joy. It doesn't matter if we're embroiled in anger and blame, or frozen out by cold and distant withdrawal. Couples in crisis are not experiencing joy, either individually or together.
You're up early and you're up late. And in the middle, you seem to be running. Running to the office, to meetings, to soccer games, to the grocery store, to the dentist, to the PTA meeting, to the birthday party for ... well, you can't even remember who the birthday party is for. You say yes to everything, because you're a team player. Try saying these five things instead.
Using people or things isn't a valid solution to our feelings of loneliness, emptiness and alienation. Consuming things -- or other people -- has never made anyone happy. That's why someone who uses other people or things in order to fill the void is compelled to keep on being a user. It never feels like enough.
I stay on my fitness horse by reminding myself that movement is a privilege and that the future Me will ALWAYS be happier if I move. The understanding that exercise positively affects my mood has informed my entire fitness philosophy. In fact, improving my mood is typically the primary reason I train.
Guilt and regret are the ugly Hyde to the Jekyll of sobriety, even years in. With new awareness, we relive past experiences---or in many cases bemoan what might have been. Pain and sorrow previously numbed by a drug or drink of choice is glaringly present, and strikes unpredictably---in the midst of a family gathering; alone, late at night; smack in the middle of an important work presentation, or during a particularly deep yoga class.
We don't spend enough time doing the things that bring us joy. This hit home for me many months ago when someone asked me what I did for fun. Because I love what I do, I immediately referenced my job. However, I struggled to answer the next question: "What do you do when you're not working?"
There is plenty of evidence showing that living in a constant state of emotional turmoil that is, in a constant state of lack of inner peace, will compromise a person's immune system as well as their mental health.
Let me tell you a little bit about myself. I'm 45 years old. I'm single. I've never been in a committed relationship. I don't have kids. My parents both died when I was in my mid-30s. I've been estranged from my oldest sister for about 20 years. I have profound hearing loss, due to deformed cochleas, and I identify as "hard of hearing."
I am beginning to wonder if the key to not succumbing to the stress of life is found in focusing less on the overall difficulty and frustration, choosing to not let these be the centre of attention: but rather, finding the five minutes of joy in each and every day.