Do you find that your staff is not friendly? That they all spend time having fun and chatting with each other, yet you don't feel that you would be welcomed if you joined the group?
It's great to work with someone who makes you feel important. Someone who remembers your name, and maybe that you have a dog named Brownie or that you recently took a vacation to Florida. When you work with someone like that, the time seems to fly and you look forward to working with them again. When you're the manager and people feel good around you, you have a more engaged team, who like their job more, and ultimately do a better job.
As a manager, it is important that your staff feels that you recognize them as a person, with a name, with feelings and with a life outside of the office.
How you make people feel is a very important part of your job.
One of the more common complaints I hear from staff members is that their manager is not friendly. When their manager walks by in the morning and doesn't even stop to say hello, people take that personally and get upset.
I realize that you are busy. You have a lot on your mind. Walking by someone without acknowledging them is not perceived as rude in your mind — but it most certainly is in the minds of many others.
I can guarantee it is affecting your success as a manager.
If your busy mind is making people feel like you are unapproachable or even rude, I can guarantee it is affecting your success as a manager.
Have you ever asked yourself how you make people feel? Do you make them feel welcome as to approach you? Do you make a point to remember people's names, and maybe even some details about them (even if you have to write it down)?
Business coach Brian Tracy says that 15 per cent of our professional success is due to our technical ability, and 85 per cent is due to our ability to get along with other people. I strongly believe that, and I like to take it a step further and say that not only do we need to get along with others, we need to be focused on how we make them feel when they are with us.
I like the way I feel when I walk into Starbucks. They make me feel special — with my special drink, my name on the cup, a nice comfy chair, free WiFi and a pleasant atmosphere in which to work or lounge.
I don't like the way I feel when I walk into McDonald's. I feel rushed and I feel anonymous.
It's all about how you make them feel!
Think about how you feel when you are in the company of your colleagues, of your boss, of the people in your local coffee shop. Where do you feel good? What is it that they're doing that makes you feel good? They are successful because of something they are doing.
Can you emulate what they're doing and make others feel good?
Here are a few very simple tips that sound like common sense. Sadly, we know that common sense is not common practice. Make these things your common practice.
- When you make eye contact with someone, make a point to really see them. One good way is to note their eye colour (because you actually have to look into their eyes to do this).
- Use their name in conversation and remember it for the next time. Remembering names is a simple secret to success that many people discount. Don't discount it.
- Pick up something personal from the conversation and make a note of it so you can bring it up the next time you see them. For example, "Last time you were in the office you were just heading off on a Caribbean vacation. How was it?"
- Take a little extra time when you're having a conversation. Stop doing what you are doing (it's not a good time to multi-task), avoid walking in the opposite direction (conversations in the halls happen this way all the time) and give your full, undivided attention to the other person for a few minutes. You won't regret it.
If you make people feel good, they are not likely to try to make you feel bad — rather, they will reciprocate. Be nice and people will be nice back. Be rude, disengaged, dismissive or unfriendly and you will be sure to get that back, too.
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