12/28/2016 07:32 EST | Updated 12/28/2016 10:25 EST

Traditional Goal Setting Is Broken

New Year goals - handwriting on a sticky note against grained wood with blank notes

How many times have you set a goal and became nowhere close to achieving it? Maybe you even struggle to think of a goal to begin with. As a life fulfillment coach, I've worked with numerous people who really struggle with goal setting, and through my work with them I've developed a clear understanding as to why.

We've all been taught that to achieve our goals we must create the appropriate action steps to get there. To think of the big picture and work backwards to make a plan that will get us to where we want to be. I'm not saying by any means that this is wrong and it doesn't work. There's just a much deeper layer we're unaware of that is ultimately getting in our way.

Setting goals requires you to become vulnerable.

When we aren't able to achieve what we set out to accomplish, despite how great our intentions are, we're left feeling like failures. A lot of the time to make ourselves feel better we even end up making excuses as to why the goal doesn't matter anymore. Regardless of how we feel, the real problem is we didn't do enough work around initially setting the goal in the first place.

There is one major factor as to why traditional goal setting is broken. If you truly want to make changes in your life, the first action step you need to take is doing work around your belief system.

It's really astounding, but not surprising how many of us are unaware of how our belief system shows up in how we show up everyday. It's such a part of who we are that we're immune to seeing the effects of it. However, those unconscious beliefs easily creep into our ability to reach our goals.

Setting goals requires you to become vulnerable. You're creating change in your life, which is never an easy feat. That vulnerability easily causes you to have doubts and those doubts are linked to the beliefs you have about yourself. They can stem back to what you've been taught growing up, or how you've interpreted certain experiences and events throughout your life.

You just need to work through some of the muck to get to a place where you truly believe in yourself.

Goal setting has all of a sudden become far more complex!

It doesn't mean it's impossible. It just means you need to start digging deeper and being really honest with yourself if you have big goals and aspirations you're looking to achieve. This should be the first step in setting a goal. It can be really challenging to work through, as we tend to not see our own blind spots.

That's why working with a Life Coach or a Therapist can be beneficial. They have the ability to work with you as you uncover those belief systems that are getting in your way. You've got what it takes. You just need to work through some of the muck to get to a place where you truly believe in yourself. It is only then when you understand your true motivation, that you will have the desire to follow through with the action steps you put in place.






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