What is it about the MTV Video Music Awards that inspires such chaos, drama, and shocking disasters? Maybe it's the fact that the Moonman is ultimately meaningless, and so the VMAs derive all their pop-cultural power from the invited musicians' most ridiculous moments.
Whether it's Courtney Love attacking Madonna or Diana Ross fondling Lil' Kim in the '90s to Lady Gaga's meat dress and Beyonce's baby bump in the 2000s, the VMAs are never dull.
Now I'mma let you finish, but here are the most shocking and bizarre VMA moments of all time. OF ALL TIME!
Pee-Wee Herman Asks "Heard Any Good Jokes Lately?" (1991)
Pee-Wee Herman had a spectacular career with his Tim Burton-directed "Big Adventure" and his smash kids' show -- until he got caught masturbating in an adult movie theatre. His first post-scandal appearance was this perfectly self-deprecating gag to open the VMAs. He got a standing ovation. He deserved it.
Nirvana Bassist Smashes Himself In The Head (1992)
Nirvana had a love-hate relationship with MTV but that doesn't mean they didn't go all-in during their '92 VMA performance. So Krist Noveselic was probably just trying to make a rock'n'roll moment when he launched his bass high into the air -- and he achieved that effect when it subsequently cracked him on the head, knocking him to the floor.
Howard Stern Turns The Other Cheek (1992)
Shock jock Howard Stern debuted his superhero alter-ego Fartman at the 92 VMAs, descending onto the stage with a really bad case of gas and an uncovered tush.
Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie Presley Kiss (1994)
The marriage of the King of Pop and the daughter of the King of Rock'n'Roll was seen by many as Jackson's attempt to salvage his reputation after child molestation accusations. The couple made their made public debut at the VMAs with an awkward kiss and Jackson's snarky "And just think, nobody thought this would last." By the way, it didn't.
Diana Ross Jiggles Lil' Kim's Breast (1999)
Lil' Kim showed up at the '99 VMAs wearing a scandalous top. Perhaps we would have forgotten about it, but later that evening, while presenting an award to Diana Ross, the legendary singer couldn't resist the temptation to give Kim's boob a lil' jiggle.
Courtney Loves Throws Contents of Her Purse at Madonna (1995)
Courtney Love, the very definition of a hot mess, began throwing contents of her purse at Madonna while the Material Girl was in the midst of an interview. They then proceeded to go at one another on live television.
Fiona Apple Tells The Kids That Celebrity Is "Bullshit" (1997)
Accepting her "Best New Artist" VMA, Fiona Apple took the opportunity to warn viewers about the celebrity life the award show was celebrating: "This world is bullshit, and you shouldn't model your life on what we think is cool, and what we're wearing and what we're saying."
Rage Against The Machine Protest Limp Bizkit (2000)
The rap-rock band was better known for protesting globalization and George Bush, but it's hard to blame Rage bassist Tim Commerford for getting rage-y after losing to Limp Bizkit's "Break Stuff." So he climbed the set to disrupt Fred Durst's acceptance, and was later arrested.
Tommy Lee and Kid Rock Fight Over Pam Anderson (2007)
Two of the "Baywatch" star's beaus came to blows off-camera at the 2007 VMAs. Lee apparently said something to which Rock responded with a slap and a punch. Lee was removed from the venue while Rock got cited for misdemeanor battery. Jamie Foxx later pleaded to the audience that we need to "stop the white-on-white crime."
Britney Spears, Madonna and Christina Aguilera Make Out (2003)
Who could forget the famous kiss between Britney Spears and Madonna, and Madonna and Christina Aguilera during their MTV VMA performance in 2003? Oh, you forgot Madge kissed Xtina? That might have been because MTV's producers cut to a Timberlake reaction shot after the Brit lip-smack.
Britney Spears Snake Performance (2001)
Britney Spears performed "I'm Slave 4 U" with an albino python, shocking the audience and enraging animal rights activist group PETA.
Triumph The Insult Comic Dog Tries To Sniff J.Lo's Butt (2001)
The hand-puppet from the Conan O'Brien show would later start a feud with Eminem at the following year's VMAs, but it's hard to top this delightful exchange with Jennifer Lopez. "J. Lo. J. Lo. Please, please let me get a sniff of your butt. Come on. I don’t get it. J. Lo. She doesn't understand. For a dog it's like climbing Mt. Everest."
Kanye West Doesn't Let Taylor Swift Finish (2009)
Taylor Swift won the "Best Female Video" award, making history as the first country singer to do so. But she soon made history again when Kanye West appeared out of nowhere and interrupted Swift's acceptance, claiming that Beyonce had made the best music video of all time and turning "I'mma let you finish" into an eternal meme.
Lady Gaga Bleeds on Stage (2009)
Lady Gaga is known for her eccentricity but nobody saw the unexpected blood-soaked finale coming during a performance of "Paparazzi" at the 2009 VMAs.
Sacha Baron Cohen Lands on Eminem (2009)
Sacha Baron Cohen, dressed like a scandalous angel to promote his Bruno movie, dropped from the sky and right onto Eminem's face. The rapper did not find this funny and walked out, though it was <a href="http://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/eminem-and-brunos-mtv-awards-stunt-was-staged-writer-says-20090602" target="_blank">later revealed</a> Slim Shady was in on the joke and they even practiced it at the dress rehearsal.
Lady Gaga Wears Meat Dress (2010)
Lady Gaga risked the ire of PETA to make a statement about, um, pop starts being treated pieces of meat? Nope, apparently it had to do with the U.S. military's don't ask-don't-tell policy. Whatevs, but it sure was memorable and is now a museum piece in the Rock'n'Roll Hall of Fame after being preserved as jerky.
Rihanna and Chris Brown Kiss (2012)
After what Chris Brown did to his then-girlfriend en route to the 2009 Grammys, fans were shocked to find out Rihanna gave him a hug and kiss after winning the best video award.