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Canadian Sex Positions (NSFW)

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Our igloos have melted and the sun is out, and we busy Canucks are ready to get (even more) busy.

"Canadians are very open about sex in general," says Jessica O’Reilly, author of The New Sex Bible. "Though the types of sex we have may be quite similar across the culture, the way we talk about it and what it means to us personally is quite different."

If you're looking for ways to pleasure that beaver or lumberjack in your life, the Huffington Post Canada has some suggestions for you. (And even though you're hopefully not working today, we'd like to emphasize that these are decidedly NSFW.) We've come up with 10 different sex positions based on some of our favourite patriotic stereotypes, and O'Reilly has provided the expertise to ensure they're, well, doable.

So if you're seeking an activity that's more geared towards the indoors this Canada Day, look no further. And if you're really feeling like playing the part, try them out in a canoe.

  • Justine Marimla
    If poutine and maple syrup have been weighing you down during the colder months, The Double Double provides the perfect way to burn off those calories while gettin’ it on.

    TO DO IT: Both partners get down on one knee facing one another. One partner lifts their leg over their partner’s bent knee so that they can get even closer as they bump, grind and let their backbones slide in perfect harmony. This position is not only a top caloric burner, but the intimate positioning is perfect for deep tongue kissing, eye-gazing and dirty whispers (e.g. You’re so hot, eh!).
  • Justine Marimla
    Canadians have a reputation for being friendly, so smile widely while you show your eager beaver some love with The Friendly Beaver.

    TO DO IT: One partner stands next to the bed (or the kitchen table) and bends over so that her upper half is pressed against the mattress with her feet on the floor. The other partner gets down on their knees and approaches from behind. This position provides the perfect angle for full-beaver pleasure, so be sure to swipe your tongue all the way to the front where you’ll find the bilingual fourchette — the highly erogenous fork in the road where the lips meet.
  • Justine Marimla
    Take your lover for a musical ride — stampede style.

    TO DO IT: One partner sits on the edge of the bed with their feet on the floor and legs together. The other partner climbs on top facing away and kneels on the mattress with their legs on either side of their lover. The rear partner “harnesses" their partner in place by holding onto their hips or chest to control the rhythm. Most of us will never live up to the stereotype of riding a moose or a bear, so we’ll have to settle for The Dirty Mountie, which targets the G-Spot and provides a smokin’ hot view.
  • Justine Marimla
    Build your own personal Sugar Shack using your hot bodies and a few pieces of living room furniture.

    TO DO IT: One partner sits on the couch with their legs outstretched onto an ottoman (positioned a few feet away) and the other partner straddles their legs in a shallow squat position between the couch and footrest. They pump against one another to create the perfect rhythm in their super-sweet love shack.
  • Justine Marimla
    You need not be a hockey pro or a puck bunny to enjoy the Just Puck Me position.

    TO DO IT: In this dually-stimulating arrangement, one partner lies on their back with their knees bent against their abdomen/chest (in a reclined squat position). The other partner squats down from a standing position facing away and exercises complete control over their submissive partner. If there is a penis in the mix, be careful not to bend it — “sorry" won’t suffice to heal a penile injury.
  • Justine Marimla
    We may be friendly and polite, but sometimes even Canadians are in the mood for a good pounding. A study out of over 1,500 Canadians found that sexual fantasies are highly varied and common ones include a range of activities from whipping and spanking to sex in public.

    TO DO IT: In this position, one partner lies face-down on the bed with their legs hanging off the edge. The other partner stands on the floor and lifts the first partner’s legs to hip height as they pound from behind. You may want to reserve The Pounding Lumberjack technique for the end of your sex session when the body has been chemically primed (by oxytocin and endorphins) for rougher play.
  • Justine Marimla
    Summer is officially here, but that only means that the longest day of the year is already behind us! You may want to save this one for the chillier months (or for a cooler night up north by the campfire).

    TO DO IT: Both partners lie on their sides facing one another. One partner slides their body between the other’s legs and throws their upper leg over their partner’s upper hip to create a unique angle for pleasure. Once you start to warm up, you can remove your hipster toques and allow the heat of your twisted bodies to steam up the windows. For our out-of-country readers who might be wondering — the answer is yes. We do, in fact, have windows in our igloos for The Toque Twist.
  • Justine Marimla
    Not unlike the stunning Canadian Rockies, The Rocky Mountain is a sight to behold. Sure — the former may be a magnificent natural wonder, but this position is perfect for enhanced friction for both partners and can be performed in the great outdoors.

    TO DO IT: One partner bends over in a downward dog-like pose so that their body resembles the peak of a mountain. The other partner stands upright and approaches from behind.
  • Justine Marimla
    Take the traditional 69 position and flip it on its side (so both partners are facing one another) and you’ve got the Oh-So-Canadian 49 position.

    TO DO IT: Since this arrangement is easier on the neck and back than its more popular cousin, you can prolong your sex play and live up to the Canadian stereotype of the long-lasting lover.
  • Justine Marimla
    The maple leaf is basically our symbol of pride. This Canada Day, The Maple Leap will help you recreate this precious symbol with your bodies.

    TO DO IT: Simply lie on your back and press your partner’s face in between your legs. Throw your legs over your partner’s shoulders with your knees bent and have your partner bend their knees as well. You feet should meet up to form a basic maple leaf with your upper body as a thick stem. By pressing the soles of your feet into your partner's, you can engage your core and pelvic floor muscles to intensify sensations.

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