Do You Have the Self-Confidence to Succeed?

01/28/2013 05:10 EST | Updated 03/30/2013 05:12 EDT

"You must not be indecisive today, because an opportunity will arrive out of the blue, and if you don't make use of it immediately, it will pass you by just as quickly. You may not feel confident, but act as if you are." My horoscope for January 25.

I have often found that when I am on the right path, doing what I am meant to be doing, I meet or connect with someone who is meant to help me. It is powerful stuff and gives you a boost that is hard to measure.

Many people say that there is no such thing as coincidences and I would agree. Often on the face of it, events in your life can seem unrelated, and yet on closer inspection, there is some significance, some lesson you are supposed to learn from the experience.

Of course, that can only happen if you have your antennae up, are listening and watching closely as to what is going on around you. You also have to be prepared to think creatively, to see potential where it may have not existed before and to be open to opportunities that just reveal themselves to you.

I am on this path of thinking because today, like my horoscope above predicted, I had one such day where one chance conversation led to another and before we knew it, we were truly helping each other and the support was reciprocal. And then there was a chance email that reminded me of someone who would be perfect for my conference, and so I reached out and that may well happen too. It feels good.

Once you open yourself up to such opportunities, it has a snowball effect, often triggering even more chances to grow, because you feel bolstered by that one success and ready to try again and take that risk of putting yourself out there. In many ways, you have to ask yourself, what is the worst thing that can happen? Usually it is that the person will say "no", but nothing ventured, nothing gained.

But it also comes back down to your level of confidence, in believing that you do have something to offer. So often as women we question ourselves, and self-doubt worms its way into our thoughts, and we can be paralyzed by fear that we might fail, so we do nothing. When we are indecisive, we limit our level of success and how far we can go.

It reminds me of when I used to teach parenting classes, I would often describe a child with high self-esteem as one with lots of poker chips, ready to gamble, because he was pretty well stocked up and could afford to lose some. On the other hand, the child with only one or two, hoards them, not taking risks because there is too much at stake and he's afraid to lose.

It's like that as adults. We probably all know of someone who could be so successful if she could just well... get out of her own way. It is hard to ask someone to believe in you, when you don't believe in yourself. And as a result those synchronistic moments can just pass you by, as you are too wrapped up in today, to even contemplate tomorrow and the options available to you.

Lack of confidence is one barrier but another is the fear of change. "If I do this, what will happen to...? " All those internal questions can kill a great idea dead before it has even had a chance to blossom and come to fruition.

As an entrepreneur I personally embrace change, partly because I get bored easily but also because then you are always learning and growing. Yes, you will make mistakes but consider them invaluable lessons to learn, and then move on.

The key to being innovative and creative is to have respect for ideas -- your own and other peoples; to always keep an open mind and an eye on the potential of pursuing a different avenue.

Staying and standing still doesn't achieve much and when you continue to do the same old, same old -- you don't move forward at all.

Regardless of your horoscope, take a risk. Open your mind to other possibilities. Drive home a different way. Start looking at how you can change your game, because when you can, who knows who you will meet or what opportunities will arise. You create your own synchronicity.