OTTAWA -- Hot weather in Central Canada and early departures for the cottage pushed Canada into a significant news deficit in the second half of June, Statistics Canada reported Friday.
All told, Canada exported only on major news story in the second half of June: the UN Human Rights Council's citation of Canada for its handling of Quebec student protests.
By contrast, Canada was a net importer of news from the Eurozone, the United States, and -- for the 55th consecutive year -- from the Middle East.
The month had opened very strongly, with a record-breaking surge in news exports.
"Global manhunt for Canadian porn-star cannibal" dominated news markets everywhere. Canada however could not sustain this one-time venture into the lurid dismemberment marketplace. International buyers showed little interest in a mass shooting in Toronto's Eaton Center, preferring to rely on their traditional supplier of mass-shooting news, the U.S. postal system.
After the month's strong first week, the Canadian news supply industry tumbled into a deep slump.
News about the leader of the Parti Quebecois first wearing -- and then ceasing to wear -- a small piece of red felt failed to excite consumers. A casual remark from a police official about too many 911 calls about dogs locked in cars generated some local news manufacturing activity in the Greater Toronto Area, but the stimulus proved short-term, expiring within 24 hours.
Not even an amusingly candid email by a federal cabinet minister could overcome resistance from consumers who shifted their attention from disasters and massacres to swimming and boating.
Forecasters warned that Canada's news deficit would likely remain wide through July and August.
"Canada is competing against a whole planet filled with mayhem and misery. Political stability, economic growth, and a chronically declining crime rate simply do not provide the basis for a strong news industry. I think we have face the fact that Canadians may just lack what it takes to be a major news export power," explained a spokesperson for Statistics Canada.
Meanwhile, Canada's historical demand for imported news continues strong. Emerging products like the pending Islamist takeover in Egypt have supplemented traditional suppliers like the U.S. political cycle and the British royal family.
However, some analysts in private industry offer a contrarian view. "We see major constraints ahead for Canada's news-production competitors," argued a trader who specializes in CBC stock for CreditZurich. "We don't think a U.S. presidential election featuring Mitt Romney will be able to sustain enduring global consumer demand for the American product. Plus, we think the Eurozone story is over-bought. It will not end in the collapse of the currency and a global depression. Failing that, who wants to watch more video of the Slovenian finance minister walking into and then walking out of an office building in Belgium?"
She added: "Plus, we think the Canadian industry has shown impressive capacity to innovate with its porn-star cannibal line of business. We strongly believe that the porn-star cannibal model is scalable, and can grow into an ongoing export item."
Yet the predominant view is bearish. "Let's face it," said the Statistics Canada spokesperson. "Unless you have Chinese-style economies of scale, you simply cannot possibly generate porn-star cannibal news with any regularity.
"Canada's most important news trading partner is the United States. Always has been, always will be. And the American market looks overwhelmingly for one steady, standard product from Canadian news suppliers: Is there a cold front of Arctic air heading south from Canada? If yes, they buy. If not, not. Until the cold fronts start moving again in late November, we don't see much chance for any kind of consistent recovery in Canadian news exports."
David Frum be away next week, on assignment covering the Euro crisis from the Bay of Naples, with special attention to the impact of the crisis on restaurants, cafes, and makers of men's shirts.
This blog is cross-posted at the National Post.
Follow David Frum on Twitter: www.twitter.com/@davidfrum
Wanna match lie for lie from the CBC vs SunTV?
I'll show ten CBC lies for every SunTV lie you have to show me, and I'll still be pointing out CBC whoppers long after you run out of material.
CBC reported that there were 31000 complaints to Elections Canada over the so called Robocalls affair, the reality was just over 1000, and most of them were about Elections Canada itself.
Only off by a factor of 30, not bad for the CBC....
Wafergate?
Gee, it turned out the three weeks of breathless reporting by the CBC on that was just another lie as well.
CNN was the first toprove that in slow times there are some people who will fabricate a crisis to broadcast.
Perhaps you try to hide this facet of your Canadian identity because you feel your highfalutin' Washington cronies just won't understand. This is all probably something you want to keep on the down low. You probably already booked a round trip red-eye from the Italian Riviera to catch a show on the North American tour without being missed on the cocktail circuit. “Back in a few days Silvio, 'Blackie' called me last night crying, got to go to Toronto and buck him up.”
This double life will trip you up eventually. You'll be left alone in your library with your Rush posters and fan packs and deluxe vinyl pressings to spend the days listening to “Tom Sawyer”on repeat with a single tear rolling down your cheek as your Washington friends keep you out in the cold like some too earnest warrior cashiered from 'the service' at the end of a John le Carré novel. But at least you'll still have “2112” to keep you warm.
Canadian Media should be able to package up still photo's, spill site video's, spill site interviews, some dead beavers, some Pipeline Owners wearing white hard hats and package it as news for EXPORT internationally.
Since Harpo will try to get the dirty crude oil pipeline to the West Coast, maybe we should send some media types to Asia and China and ask them how they feel about our OIL SPILLS. It didn't take them long to shut their markets to Canadian beef when mad cow struck.
Maybe, with luck, they won't accept dirty crude because of the environmental destruction.
But, no matter, the NEWS is manufactured and controlled as evidenced by this video: http://bit.ly/4juXH0 .
David Frum used to have an idea about Canada, but now he's lost all credibility after being Bush's mouth.If Canadians listen to David Frum, it's all Bushonomics and economic catastrophe to come.
Harper is destroying the economy just fine all on his own, without any help destroying the economy from Frum, the way he helped destroy the American economy and deceived the American people for 8 years..
Please, even they themselves admit they are hopelessly biased.
Much better is the local news on TV , and on CBC radio .
Peacefulness just may take over the globe, continent by continent, if we don't watch out!