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Life: What's the Plan and Do We Need One?

Posted: 03/ 6/2012 8:58 am

The pursuit of happiness -- we're all aiming for it, but what does it really mean? Is it finding love, achieving goals or working hard to be able to pursue what you believe in? How do we get there? Is there a big plan? Do we have a destiny?

Movies are one of my favourite escapes from the everyday. Have you seen the Adjustment Bureau? In it there's a "bureau" with the job of ensuring people's lives proceed as determined by a documented pre-written "plan." According to "the plan," the two lead characters are not destined to be a couple, because if they are, then the Emily Blunt character won't become a world-renowned ballerina and the Matt Damon character won't become president. They would not be able to achieve their full potential because just being together would be "enough." Is it more important to have a contented love relationship or achieve your full potential? Which outcome will make you happiest... and does it have to be a choice?

These are some of the types of questions I'll be setting out to explore in my weekly blog posts. What qualifies me to write about these things? Nothing in particular, I'm an everyday girl who enjoys the simple pleasures in life -- my family and friends, I love my job, travelling, dessert and last, but definitely not least, fabulous shoes! I have a passion for life, love and relationships, and I'm also a big dreamer, an incurable romantic and believe strongly that doing good for others ultimately means doing good for yourself.

Like many, I set goals and I generally make life plans. If my life is part of a "bigger plan," it's certainly an interesting one... As a young teen it seemed my destiny was to be a concert pianist. Then I threw a big wrench in "the plan" by getting married at 17. I had a baby at 18 and was divorced by 20. After finishing university, I took my son and moved to New York to follow my dreams in the media and fashion capital of the world. In my late 20s, I returned to my hometown and was swept off my feet by a handsome non-Jewish lawyer. A few years later I started my namesake PR company, NKPR.

From the outside, my life today may appear quite fast-paced and perhaps even glamorous to some... When I'm not travelling between New York, Miami, Los Angeles and Toronto, I'm making the most of each day at my company, where I lead a team of more than 30 brilliant and inspiring women (and let's not forget two very talented men!).

Sometimes, however, it seems easier to run my company than it is my personal life. Recently my marriage broke down and I'm now separated. It wasn't part of the plan. I'm also finding my timeline is out of whack. Many of my friends are just having babies now and I'm about to send my son off to law school. I have no idea what the future holds. There are moments when I want to cling to the past, but I'm pushing through and opening myself up to the realization is that perhaps there is a more unconventional way to live and love. It's time, once again, for me to redefine the plan and what happiness looks like. There are choices to be made and I wish I had a crystal ball, and I do indulge in some psychic advice here and there for guidance (thank you Robin Cleland!).

I'm a little scared, but I'm also really excited. Life is about being brave and embracing change, after all (and that will be my next tattoo). There's a lot to figure out and I thought it would be more enjoyable to travel on this journey with others. So if you'd like to join me, I'm hoping for a two-way dialogue and I'll be posting twice a week. On "Talk to me Tuesdays," we'll be exploring anything and everything... and I mean everything: life, love, sex, relationships -- it can't get too juicy! On Fridays, I want to celebrate all things "fabulous" by talking about something near and dear to my heart: fashion -- home fashion or personal style - the sky's the limit!

Until Friday...

XO Natasha

 

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07:05 AM on 03/07/2012
this person, like many young winners has alot going for her and will prob have a great life. as for the artilces i don't think i need to hear from someone gushing about her life, i already had mine
04:11 PM on 03/06/2012
Natasha your post and article couldn't have come at a better time. I find my self although not at the same stage of life as you very uncertain and somewhat shaken up that my idea of my "plan" did not work out. I just experienced the end of a relationship I really thought was going somewhere( possibly a great and true love)...

I have been fortunate to be successful in the job world at a young age already holding a full time well paying position while many of my friends are still trying to get into the job market. I am hoping that this end will bring a new beginning.

But I wonder does it ever get easier having the "plan" break? Or are we going about it all wrong? Should it really be living without a plan? ( I've tried my personality doesn't let me) So where and how do we find someone we match up with?
11:36 AM on 03/12/2012
I am so sorry that you are feeling uncertain about life...I know it sounds cliche....but you will come out of this much stronger. When break up's happen it often means that this was not the person you were meant to end up with. There is a wonderful book called "Broken Open"...I strongly recommend reading it. Whenever I have gone through a break up I always revisit it...because often when we feel broken we infact are broken open...and that's a good thing....Because we get back in touch with who we are and what's important to us - We become more open...and it helps us get back on track. As for love, if you are open to love...you will find love again - love is all around us...the key is to have your eyes and heart open - you can't see in front of you if you are still looking back. I hope this helps a little...I think you might really enjoy the blog post tomorrow...xo Natasha
04:08 PM on 03/06/2012
I've been studying happiness for years, both the aspirational and the psychological perspectives. Its a great topic and we all have ideas about what it is, how to achieve it, and if we're supposed to have it. I'm looking forward to your weekly posts and hearing other's perspectives.
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jf12
Esta vez saldré como las otras y me escaparé.
11:18 AM on 03/06/2012
I don't think that seeking out change is particularly brave. It is often far braver to try to stand against it.