We rely on the expression around the eyes with our partners to connect. It tells us if they are feeling safe or happy or worried or threatened. Without this cue we don't know how to respond. We see this in children with autism who have flat muscle tone around the eyes; not only are we unable to understand their social engagement cues, but they are not able to understand ours either.
I think the biggest ruse that women try to sell themselves, and each other, is that WE are aging naturally. While some of us are 'maturing' better than others, my belief is that after a certain age most women are actively doing their personal best to slow down father time -- they're just not telling anyone about it.
I worked with two actors for my project that included facial Botox injections. The actors posed for "before" and "after" video shoots while reciting highly affective Shakespearean soliloquies. The resulting two-channel HD video highlights the uncanny differential appearance as the result of Botox-induced muscle paralysis.
A friend, a generation behind, recently suggested in a matter of fact way, "You should get some Botox injections." "You're kidding," I said. "I can think of a million other things I'd rather do with my money." Come to think of it, most of my younger friends comment on physical appearance, for better or worse, all the time. I'm surprised there isn't a self-help book called Botox Soup for the Soul!
We have abandoned our old folk, and done so effectively. Why? They are not wounded animals wandering off to the forest to lick their wounds and die. Seniors are not ugly because of their wrinkles or yellowing fingernails. Their folds and crinkles are exquisite like the trunks of an aging redwood. We are the unsightly ones.