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While men have a less specific window.
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If you don't know who the other woman or man is, you may be painfully curious --iIs the other person more attractive than me? What did my partner see in him or her? You may think that confronting them will make them back off or that they might tell you certain details of the affair that your spouse will not reveal. But it's never that simple.
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Too often, an unfaithful spouse whose affair has been discovered will continue to see and/or contact their affair partner. Sometimes this is done in secret. They may assure their spouse that they've ended the affair; however, their lack of transparency and untrustworthy behaviour indicates otherwise.
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You look the other way and pretend not to notice or be bothered. You force yourself to not ask who your spouse is texting and not show how worried or hurt you are. You lay awake and stare at your partner's phone, wishing you could look through it but not wanting to cross that line. Finally, you crack.
If your spouse's name came up on this list of dumped emails, how would you feel? And what would you do? Would you forgive them and try to work on the relationship? Would you ever be able to trust your spouse again?
Many people who suspect their partner is having an inappropriate opposite sex friendship -- and who fear it is leading to infidelity -- often end up questioning themselves or worrying that they are being jealous, paranoid or controlling. After all, no one wants to be "that" spouse.
Devastation, anger, betrayal -- without a doubt, these are the emotions certain to overwhelm any marriage in the wake of infidelity. But what isn't quite as clear when the dust settles is whether to s...