"Who the hell uses the pullout method?!" This is the reaction I got from a friend regarding an article published in NY Mag a few weeks ago. And at first, I thought the same thing. You would think that with so many forms of contraception available in the market today, that women wouldn't need to resort to such an archaic form of birth control, right? I mean we're living in the 21st century for crying out loud.
At least that's what I thought until I looked into it myself. To answer my friend's question, quite a lot of women are using the pullout method. So much so that the author of the NY mag article dubbed women in their 20s and 30s the "pullout generation." And if this is true, why aren't we talking about it more?
We have no problem talking about condoms and birth control, now let's look into this together. From why women do it, the risks involved and possibly the potential benefits. Let's get educated ladies.
Related: When Love Makes You Sick
Contrary to popular belief, not all women who use the pullout method use it because they're irresponsible or unprepared. But it does happen, usually amongst women in their late teens and early 20s. The story usually goes like this:
You meet a guy (at bar, party, you name it), and you decide to take it to the next level. Or maybe things are getting hot and heavy with your man. Whatever the situation, things escalate quickly. You're either too shy to interrupt and tell him to put on a condom or you both realize neither of you have one. To make things worse, you're not taking any birth control. Either way, you decide to take a risk and just hope for the best. He said he would pullout in time so no problem, right?
WRONG. Don't feel bad for "ruining the mood" or carrying condoms with you. Maybe you have to stop the situation from escalating all together. The last thing you want is to feel stressed and paranoid until your period comes. IF it comes that is...
The pill can suck
We may have an abundance of birth control methods available for women, but the truth is they simply don't work for everyone. We've all heard of the side effects that sometimes comes with taking the pill. The mood swings, low sex drive, and increased chances of depression or anxiety. Many women are fortunate enough that they don't experience any of these symptoms, while others feel it all. So when the pill doesn't work, women move on to other methods.
Condoms are no fun...sometimes
We all know the stereotype that men hate condoms but they're not the only ones. Some women hate them just as much. They feel that sex isn't as pleasurable with condoms, plain and simple. So that's when they resort to the...
A lot of women who use the pullout method do it because the pill, condoms and/or any other forms of birth control just aren't not for them. Women who actively choose to use this method have everything down to a T. According to the NY Mag article, some women go as far as downloading menstrual cycle apps on their phone and follow their ovulation cycle. They use condoms only on days where they're ovulating. Every other day is reserved for pulling out.
Now, this method isn't recommended for women who enjoy casual encounters because there's no way you can protect yourself from STDs. Typically women who use this method are in a serious monogamous relationship. So just in case an accident does happen, it's not the end of the world.
But does this method really work? Researchers found that when the pullout method is used correctly, four out of 100 couples will get pregnant in the first year compared to two out of 100 couples who use condoms. In essence, when used properly the pullout method is almost as effective as using a condom. However when used incorrectly, the rates of pregnancy obviously go up (18 in 100). Another thing to take into consideration is men's pre-ejaculation or better known as pre-cum. In a survey, researchers found that in 41 per cent of men's pre-cum contained sperm which can cause pregnancy.
Pulling out does come with it's fair share of risks but perhaps risks no greater than any other method (when done correctly, obviously). If you and your man are pros at the pullout method, yes, sex can be awesome. But keep in mind, you need to trust that your guy will actually withdraw in time. Pulling out isn't for the sexually inexperienced.
In the end, whether or not you believe the pullout method is a legitimate form of birth control, we need to be able to speak openly and honestly about it. Ultimately, you need to find what works best for you. Educate yourselves on the different options out there and take away the shame of talking about sex. I mean we're living in the 21st century for crying out loud.
Tanya Cruz for 29Secrets
"9 1/2 Weeks" centers on the electric relationship between John (Mickey Rourke) and Elizabeth (Kim Basinger). Released in 1986, the film highlights the kinky sexual relationship between the two, involving ice cubes and blindfolds.
Released in 1981, "Body Heat" was called "one of the steamiest movies of all time" <a href="http://www.empireonline.com/reviews/reviewcomplete.asp?FID=16294">by a reviewer.</a> Starring William Hurt and Kathleen Turner, the film features an illicit affair and all the scandalous scenes that come with it.
The 1997 blockbuster is about a the sinking of the Titanic, but also the love affair between Rose (Kate Winslet) and Jack (Leonardo DiCaprio). "Titanic" heats up when Jack and Rose take their hidden love inside a vehicle on the ship and steam it up.
2005's "Brokeback Mountain" stars Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger as men living in 1960s Wyoming who become sexually involved and fall in love, producing sexy scenes and the famous line, "I wish I knew how to quit you."
Starring a young Dennis Quaid as a New Orleans detective, "The Big Easy" highlights a sexy opposites-attract relationship. Quaid's character of Remy becomes involved with Anne (Ellen Barkin), producing an intimate, memorable sex scene.
Sharon Stone and Michael Douglas star in 1992's "Basic Instinct." The film weaves a tangled web of sexual relationships as a murder trial is investigated.
1973's "Don't Look Now" features one of the most celebrated sex scenes in cinema. Donald Sutherland and Julie Christie play an arguing couple living a tumultuous life. The two connect at one point during the film, resulting in an iconic sex scene.
The 1989 thriller features Nicole Kidman, Billy Zane, and Sam Neill. Kidman plays Rae, a woman who seduces a shady character named Hughie (Zane) as a strategy to save herself.
James Spader plays the original Mr. Grey in 2002's "Secretary." E. Edward Grey is a lawyer who becomes involved in a BDSM relationship with his secretary (Maggie Gyllenhaal), resulting in boundary-pushing scenes in this Golden Globe-nominated film.
"A History of Violence" is a 2005 thriller starring Viggo Mortensen and Maria Bello. The pair plays a couple who mixes up their sex life with costumes and shocking hookups on the stairs.
2001's "Mulholland Drive" stars Naomi Watts, Justin Theroux and Laura Harring. Crime, a case of amnesia, and Hollywood dreams all lead up to a famous love scene between Watts and Harring.
The 1988 adaptation of Milan Kundera's novel stars Daniel Day-Lewis and Lena Olin. The pair plays lovers who engage in some kinky sex scenes, much to the celebration of viewers.
The 2001 Oscar-nominated "Y Tu Mamá También" is a breakout film from Mexico. The drama showcases sexual relationships between teenage boys and a much older woman.
The 1978 "Coming Home" stars Jane Fonda as Sally, the wife of a Marine fighting in the Vietnam War. While he is abroad, she falls for a radical paraplegic vet.
"Unfaithful" is a 2002 drama, which stars Richard Gere, Diane Lane, and Olivier Martinez. Lane plays Connie, a married woman who engages in a steamy affair with Paul (Martinez). The couple's trysts provide a multitude of steamy scenes.
The Wachowskis' 1996 film "Bound" stars Gina Gershon as Corky, a woman with a shady past. She becomes involved with Violet (Jennifer Tilly), and the two begin an affair.
Marlon Brando stars in the 1962 "Last Tango in Paris." The NC-17 film introduced viewers to the use of butter as a lubricant in one of the most famous scenes.
Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore's 1990 film "Ghost" produced what is perhaps the most crafty of sex scenes. The famous scene takes place between the two as Molly (Moore) is sitting at a pottery wheel.
2001's "Monster's Ball" stars Halle Berry and Billy Bob Thornton. Berry plays Leticia, a widow, who becomes involved in a very complicated relationship with a widower, Hank (Thornton). Their mutual loneliness leads to emotionally raw sex scenes.
Tom Cruise stars in the famed "Risky Business" Cruise plays Joel, a teenager who becomes involved with a prostitue named Lana. The two end up having sex on a subway train.
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