In what has become something of a holiday tradition, Liberal MP Rodger Cuzner rose in the House Wednesday to share his annual, politically-charged re-write of the classic poem, "Twas The Night Before Christmas."
Cuzner's poems are always shared just as MPs prepare for holiday break and, without fail, contain some humourous digs at his colleagues in the Conservative and NDP benches. Last year, Cuzner had some laughs at the expense of senators Mike Duffy, Pamela Wallin and Patrick Brazeau.
But this year, the longtime MP for Cape Breton-Canso made a special reference to Kevin Vickers, the sergeant-at-arms of the House of Commons lauded as a hero for stopping the shooter who attacked Parliament Hill in October.
The premise of Cuzner's poem this year involved casting the parts in a nativity scene. But the MP said the talent pool in Prime Minister Stephen Harper’s cabinet was thin.
"I said not to be mean or even unkind but I don't think three wise men will be easy to find," he said to big laughs.
"And the gifts they would bear — frankincense, myrrh and gold — will take 50 years to deliver, I'm told," he said, a reference to the Tories’ $200-million funds for veterans that will be spread out over decades, not years.
Cuzner said he would cast Speaker Andrew Scheer as Joseph and House leader Peter Van Loan as the "cranky innkeeper" who showed little heart.
"The good shepherd should be played by a brave and strong voice. Our sergeant-at-arms is the obvious choice," Cuzner said to applause.
"But who'll play the saviour? God's only son?” Cuzner asked. "How ‘bout someone born Christmas Day, 1971?"
Of course, Cuzner was referring to Liberal Leader Justin Trudeau.
But the Liberal MP's rhymes, typically taken in good fun, aren't just reserved for the holiday season.
Last year, after Thomas Mulcair failed to stop for an RCMP screening on Parliament Hill, Cuzner wasted little time comparing the NDP leader to Reese Witherspoon and mocking Mulcair for asking an officer, "Don’t you know who I am?"
And, back in 2012, Cuzner gleefully celebrated Trudeau's victory in the boxing ring over then-Conservative senator Brazeau with "The Ballad of Justin and Patrick."
The poem gave the third-place party something to cheer about long before anyone could have guessed just how much things would change for both Brazeau and Trudeau.
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